The Terminator

Не могу сказать точно, смотрел ли я его хоть раз целиком до этого. Фильм начинается довольно мутно и медленно, но постепенно разгоняется. К тому же он такой старый, что некоторые сцены уже воспринимаются как period-piece. Stop motion иногда настолько хорош, что выглядит как живой, и вот с ним всё очень странно — с одной стороны робот должен обмануть живых людей и не двигаться как робот, с другой это значительно сказывается на его эффективности, да и типичная кинестетика не добавляет интересности.

@темы: Terminator, The Terminator, Кино

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À fond

Official russian translation.

This is a good comedy film of the no brakes subgenre. And it's actually funny (because it's not from USA).

@темы: Кинотеатр, A fond, Кино

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Monster Trucks

Official russian translation.

It is exactly what you would expect from it. It’s not very exciting and is not much more than shown in the trailers, but it’s a serviceable a kid and his monster film.

@темы: Кинотеатр, Monster Trucks, Кино, Индустрия Развлечений

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Assassin's Creed

Trois Fassbenders: Blanc

Oh, wow. An unmovie to surpass metal gear. This is a degenerate pile of degenerate shit for degenerate degenerates. It's incoherent, incohesive, spatially wrong, has no internal continuity, incomprehensible, has no scenes, has no action, has no plot has no core narrative, has no acting, has nothing to do with awful game (footage of which already can be just edited into a tolerable movie).

It's worse than Ghostbusters 2016. That was flat boring bad and awful, but at least that was. This is not.

It's the worst feature-length compilation of semi-animated screenshots of the 2017 (2016 ~2018). After this i can't believe anything can be filmed unintentionally worse this year (2017). Ah, and it has no cinematography or any graphy. And the worst 3 the worst D i ever saw in my life — it is unwatchable. Not even due to blur, flat fogs and fires or flares. It's an incomprehensible pile of yellow-grey layers of indistinctive unfocused shapes (with DOF, blur, bloom, fog, flare and aberration on top of it), which do not connect with each other or flow one into another. It's like a pop up book of 20s rayonism, which is marketed as an actual story in a feature film format. I don't know if it's even a fraction more tolerable without 3D, since it's already so terrible in every department, but at least it won't make you question why you continue to live, knowing that people who did this exist.

@темы: Кинотеатр, Энтропия, Assassin's Creed, Assassin's Creed (2016), Кино, Индустрия Развлечений

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Лабиринт. Подвиги Тесея

Начало скомкано, всё до ветки с лабиринтом лучше бы отрезать, оно не только не имеет отношения к остальному, но и Дамаст рассказывающий о прокрустовом ложе даже больше режет ухо, чем Дионис.

@темы: Мультипликация/анимация, Тесей, Лабиринт. Подвиги Тесея, Цикл «Легенды и мифы Древней Греции»

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Vercingétorix: La légende du druide roi

So, watching it now i'm not as impressed as ten years ago, but still it's an ok period piece movie.

@темы: Vercingetorix: La legende du druide roi, Кино

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Волки и овцы: бе-е-е-зумное превращение

A picture which has some ok furs and a lot of bad furries. It has pretty dumb plot, which was written to shatter any suspension of disbelief and just awful direction and sсript\editing. And rape me diagonaly, it was written by someone called "caxap.1kg".

Also for faggotstan-language marketing materials brown sheep was recoloured to be white.

@темы: Мультипликация/анимация, Энтропия, Волки и овцы: бе-е-е-зумное превращение, Индустрия Развлечений

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Spotlight (2015)

Is a "real story" movie about uncovering open secret of some local cult no one heard about in some backwater country no one cares about.

Real journalism is similar to detective work, so (real) journalism plots are just a subgenre of the "detective". So this movie could be ok, but talentless directer decided that this is not even a movie. And in real world written media is not cinema.

@темы: Энтропия, Spotlight (2015), Кино, Индустрия Развлечений

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Викинг 18+

is an ok symbolographic period piece with some cool scenes

@темы: Викинг, 0, Кинотеатр, Кино, Индустрия Развлечений

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Снежная королева 3. Огонь и лед

It is tolerable only due to it being hardcore. It's not really good due to thousands of pointless minor characters and bad slapstick. Also you can see the influence of zhonghua partners.

I was a bit shocked when Amy Macdonald - This Is The Life started playing. Like, yeah it's in a different language, but the lyrics still don't really fit the story.

@темы: Мультипликация/анимация, Кинотеатр, Энтропия, Snedronningen, Снежная королева 3. Огонь и лед, Снежная королева, Индустрия Развлечений

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Три богатыря и морской царь

This is just as boring as every other cartoon in this shared BOGATYRY ANIMNATED UNIVERSE and now with even more unfunny sidekicks.

Just remember the good moral of this story: rape drugs and sexism will result in a happy end.

@темы: Мультипликация/анимация, Кинотеатр, Три богатыря, Энтропия, Три богатыря и морской царь, BOGATYRY ANIMNATED UNIVERSE, Индустрия Развлечений

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Room (2015)

takes it one step beyond what you would expect but is still utterly boring and useless

they even were too afraid to do real fritzl

@темы: 0, Энтропия, Room (2015), Кино, Индустрия Развлечений

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The Danish Girl

a movie about Danmark so of course everyone speaks (or tris to) with english accent

the characters are utterly retarded normies who deserve to be beaten up by other normies just like them

the writing is so masturbatory that writer sploodged into his eye with spunk during autofellatio sesson and saw in it the entire sсript
hell, the movie which starts with dude sucking his own cock on camera is less forced than this (actually it's entirely not forced)

sometimes when there is no writing and you can see only performances — Eddie Redmayne does his magic
(by being as flamboyant fehg as he is in every other movie)

but then in the second half of the movie he is playing an ubearable autist

@темы: 0, Энтропия, The Danish Girl, Кино, Индустрия Развлечений

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The Big Short

This is basically the last part of Money as Debt spruced up with stock images and stock footage and crabby quotes for no reason. All while being tonally bankrupt, patronizing and unfunny; utterly failing at having any educational value.

>>this man changed your life
No, not really, i didn't even notice the 2008'th usa crisis. I probably was affected in some capacity, but under pukin's yoke, it was all the same poverty as always. The only effect it has on me personally is that there are no games after the entire gaming industry has collapsed, but again, games were a mistake.

Also, it's pretending that that recession is anything new and not a regular self-correction of the economy system, which is just a religious cult. The banking system can't die, because only robot overlords can count every hoomie on earth and give them an objective value and provide assets. Until then we need a functioning live self-managing abstract organism living in a faith-cloud, because the one thing every living organism wants is to survive (and procreate into other countries, ideologies and spheres (like politics)).

But in the end, the movie has good performances and enjoyable fictional characters, so it is tolerable overall.

@темы: Энтропия, The Big Short, Кино, Индустрия Развлечений

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Ex Machina (фильм)

Я у мамки сегодня с электроовцами.

Green sk(ree\i)n(-)suit is not on par with Johnny number 5, or uncanny valley bots, so it just looks pedestrian on whatshername (i don't care). You are not looking at a robot and think "Oh my gah!". You are just looking at a chick with CGI on top. Yes, i understand that's the point of the story, but viewers are not a part of the story. It's designers' work to convey the point and make it look good. This one looks boring.

It has a lot of cinematographic autism. Like "mom sez uhm director" and "mom sez uhm postmodernist". That brings nothing to the table and looks amateur, while also ruining gesamtkunstwerk. Even if i manually edit all garbage out, shorten the merciless runtime and make it snappier and more to the point, writing is still filled with too much unfixable plot-holes. Even if the protagonist being an utter degenerate is explained, the rest of the characters are not justified. The dialogues, and the attitude of the writers are stupid. No, actually people switch off other people based on test all the time. Like on pregnancy test, for example. The film's tone is all over the place. The ending is too long. And not in the sense like other people say it, but it's just dull unstylish, and creates one more plot-hole out of nothing.

Well it was a mildly entertaining trip. Up to the point where you wake up in thai, riding 70yo tranny's dick, while holding a pack of shrooms.

When your high-concept is so high it is high AF.

@темы: Энтропия, Ex Machina (фильм), Кино, Индустрия Развлечений

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Pixel Puzzles 2: Space

Yet another puzzle game in the series. Most of mechanics i already covered in reviews for the 1st game and for the second series. All pictures are ok, i wouldn't call any one of them an incomprehensible repetative mess *cough, pinguins, cough*.

So, new mechanics of trading hints for achievements is kinda cool and encourages clean completion, and assembling the rocket itself is fun at the beginning, but near the end it becomes a tedium.

Works fine in UHD UWS, with pillarboxing, and fine in windowed mode.

As always, if you want one — it is one.

@темы: Pixel Puzzles, Компьютерные Игры, Pixel Puzzles 2, Pixel Puzzles 2: Space, Индустрия Развлечений

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Manthreading time

Usually i do this somewhere in january or february but >>2016 was so great i'm afraid i will forget it existed.

Let's start with worst media (which was a mistake) and move up
GOTY 2016:

I-have-to-mention-this-game-of-2016:
klocki by @targaciej

The stuff is great, but just like your love-life it's over after 15 minutes.

5.)
SteamWorld Heist by @ImageForm

Yet another two-phase хсом, but this time in TWODEE and with ricochet mechanics. (& hats).
Year was so great i have to use 2015 game with 2016 release for MR.

4.)
Stardew Valley by @ConcernedApe

Enjoyable grindfest with sometimes awkward controls.

3.)
@GrimDawn by Crate Entertainment

First unconditional GOTY. H&SARPG in grimdark cthulhoid setting. But is exactly what you would expect.

2.) @MarvelHeroes 2016 by gazillion

Yep i had an empty slot so game from 2013 is goty of 2016. Because recent patches made it great.

1.)
Brigador by Stellar Jockeys

Unconditional GOTY of 2016. 16-bit Battletech but with power of the >>current year hardware.

There were more great movies this year than the last one.
MOTY 2016:

5.) Quo Vado?
Right attitude towards office work.


4.) The Accountant
"A special mindset" movie, which delivers, unlike bournes, reachers and mechanics.


3.) Doctor Strange
Finally, one more not tryhard super cereal marvel movie.

2.) Swiss Army Man

A feature-length movie.
From guise who did Turn Down for What video.

1.) Hardcore
No explanation is necessary.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=wv33e0TyL6M

Never tried to hunt fresh tunes, but some >>2016 ones has surfaced up
TOTY 2016:

5.)
Another memeberry neowhatever from whenever.
soundcloud.com/netvoedelo/ne-tvoe-delo-ya-budu-...

4.)
Guess what? A memeberry neowhatever syphoning samples from the whole era; with dumb lyrics.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=pFBUh3hKKDg

3.)
Don't mind the opening. Basically a /zu hundert zeitgeist/.
soundcloud.com/user744362052/prod

2.)
You know you love it.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=oLhBcG3OWRM

1.)
A perfection.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=DraEO_2dToQ

@темы: Компьютерные Игры, Кино, Музыка

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Serious Sam 3: BFE

A generic nostalgia fake-revival game, which is a consolized first encounter, including dumb pyramids AGAIN. So, basically they removed most weapons, added some generic tacticool boring hitscans, added a lot of useless hitscan enemies and a lot of annoying timewasters. In level-design they shrank everything and included captain price giving you sudden death if you go out of intended path. On top of it you now may enjoy endless pitch black onaholes infested with crab louses.

At least some core gameplay is the same — you stand in the fartherst corner of the map and shoot your gun until green crosshair turns into red, or you run around getting kicked in the arse by kleers. Also now there are press X to melee, because of course it would be there.

Music is some faux-ethno annoying cymbals which is worsened by the greatest invention of all times — dynamic music (which means it randomly starts and stops, creating utter κακοφωνία right in your ears).

Well at least writing is okay, and it's funny to see Sejic in the credits.

It took me two and a half years to finish main campaign. SSam never was a masterpiece and this one is even more boring. Most of the game i completed little by little each time when i tested new hardware to see if my performance increased, because it run very bad on my base (old) PC and still drops FPS on GF970SLI and i7 on sub-high settings. And the settings are the best part of the whole game and have most gameplay and player agency in them.

Game runs fine at UHD UWS and offers good customization of HUD etc.

@темы: Serious Sam, Энтропия, Serious Sam 3, Компьютерные Игры, Serious Sam 3: BFE, Индустрия Развлечений

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Blade: Trinity

So, it turns out i haven't watched the third Blade before. It's try-hard edgy, cartoony and there is the Wade Wilson who can't shut his mouth.

Interesting, how despite having three different directors, all movies keep the same cinematography style elements from the first one — all those city shots in fast-froward.

Overall it's an enjoyable action movie, but again, not as good as the first.

@темы: marvel, Blade: Trinity, blade, Кино, Индустрия Развлечений

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Frog Fractions

Well, it turns out the legendary Frog Fractions is just basic bitch 13yo's "oh lol so random" post-modernistic waste of time.

@темы: Энтропия, Компьютерные Игры, Frog Fractions, Индустрия Развлечений