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Записи с темой: 0 (список заголовков)


Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
cronos is bizzarro sometimes it's amazing other times it's garcia marquez levels of random autism

@темы: Кино, 0


Postman Pat: The Movie

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
postmanpatthemovie starts slow as expected but thankfully gaining up steam and have very \modern\ take with edgyness by which i mean it's on par with autistic steven unifat, adventure time and great amazing world of gumball

@темы: Мультипликация/анимация, postman pat, 0



Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
zoolander has fitting cast, but having awful actors fitting your film only means it's deliberately awful-centric film about awfulness
it's still rather original but equally awkward and cringy to anchorman

@темы: Кино, zoolander, 0


Captain America Civil War

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Captain America Civil War is basically a Batman v Superman Dawn of Justice with bigger amount of more established characters and barely passable proxy instead of new take on old villain and the best part of the movie is Xbone who dies in the opening sequence and that's inevitable since all of the other fights are half-assed tavern brawls between friends who are really reluctant to hit each other as if they mean it and in general this movie undermines and dismisses international juridical system where everyone has a right for a lawyer and innocent until proven guilty. if WS would just throw white flag then the body of a doctor would be found and investigation would go further without unnecessary victims, destruction and infighting.

mr. proxy villain being arno stark would make much more sense and have bigger impact than
some random dood with no resources or baking from mister crazy alien\hesus-hating millionare just casually being mastermind manipulator with too much top secret information and leads on classified agents it's still better than winter soldier but can't step above the age of ultron i want, no i demand a series of short prequel films about Xbone with that actor and costume gathering resources or leading other operations

"No, Tony. You are the villains." And then, Tony was a Villain.

on top of everything scarlet witch and vision are so outside of everyone's league that they should only fight each other. rest insignificant
also if they were jailbroken scarlet witch could just repair winter soldier's brain especially with the help of black widow

@темы: 0, marvel, Кино, Captain America, кинотеатр


Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
чёрная молния
айрон спайдер мен
тупо но развлекательно

@темы: 0, Кино


Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
now you see me

слишком много магии авенджерс асембли
нет престижа

@темы: 0, Кино


Ratchet and Clank

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
Ratchet and Clank (film) looks amazing as if it is featured in 4k or above but writing is utterly mediocre (and mediocre level nowdays set at "abysmal" grade) on top of that localization is just plain awful and main characters are whine MARINE rookie and unlikable borefest perisher and not just because of localization, their movement, animation, cinematography are of whiny MARINE rookie and unlikable borefest perisher. even pretentious space cuckengers, evil redshirts, evil genius, bullied engineer and CEO each has more personality than 2 leads combined

@темы: 0, Ratchet and Clank, Кинотеатр, Мультипликация/анимация


the walk

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the walk is yet another fake amerikan "true story" pile of tropes and tired amerikan visual narrative with unbearably fake accents and forced diegetic excuses to speak english and filled to the brim with tropy super fake set-ups none of which have a punch-line. ok you can pretend that viewers are dumb enough to believe french parts, math parts, even sсript parts, but you have to be brain dead retarded to believe foot part. firstly nail would never pierce through foot, second it would be stuck in the bone in that place, third there would never be a single drop of blood, that's why you have to instantly ride to the doctor or cut yourself open, and that leg would be swollen for 2 weeks with pain preventing you from walking. you can't have both, either you have unwalkable pain or it's already fully healed (or you are already best breakdancer with Tetanus). well and obviously it has nothing to do with real story and unbearably boring to watch. it's amerikan visual narrative filled with obnoxious boring amerikan symbolism nobody outside of amerika ever cared for in best cases and openly laughed at in the "worst"

@темы: Кино, 0


High Rise

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High Rise is fun to watch and have really good sound design and music, it's better than indie\oppositioin scene(s) and much more cohesive, but in itself it is still pretentious metaphorical cuckery touching on subjects which were already touched in inappropriate places by everyone and in better forms. there are no point to methapor when it can be said allegorically. and it doesn't even have cohesive enough visual narrative to get the point across. it's not as bad as lynch's artistic but vomit but you have to know pretentious cuckcrowd to get what\why happening on the screen and which truisms they want to tell you this time. though he didn't manage to tell viewer his opinion on subject clearly did he mean that capitalism is bad? he clearly didn't mean that socialism is good. the only thing which is descriminable is that middle class can adapt and survive just like roaches and rats. but what future he prepared to the symbolic Kid?

@темы: Кинотеатр, Кино, High Rise, 0


Les Visiteurs : La Révolution

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Les Visiteurs : La Révolution is just a primitive comedy continuing the story and even diegestically enveloping the fact that dumb amerikan re-make made them almost 20 years set-back it's not the second coming but it's faithful to the originals and french visual narrative is a breth of fresh air in a swamp of amerikan writing

@темы: Кинотеатр, Кино, Les Visiteurs, 0


Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
R.I.P.D. is damn fun movie but needs more screen time for alternative actors
final form of bad game isn't even final form

@темы: R.I.P.D., Кино, 0


jungle book (2016)

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it's an amazing retarded fugly mess with incoherent tone and recent ffad on origin stories also it tells the story of identity crisis while having one it has dumb songs and wannaby edgy grimdark plot is dumb changes are dumb 0\10 everyone should watch it it has to be seen to be believed also in american movie even tigers explode in flames if they fell down! and there will be yet ANOTHER movie JUNGLE BOOK in 2018 and ALSO with female KAA just wow anglosphere devoid of ANY original IPs or ideas

@темы: Энтропия, Индустрия Развлечений, jungle book, 0, Кино



Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
hardcore is a best movie of 2016 and i didn't notice anything what anglosphere critics were talking about
probably they lack cultural understanding (or more likely basic understanding of juxtaposition even slightly different from tropes)
also americans are seem to be very prone to motion sickness didn't notice any and it's unheard of to get MS from flat screens around here
art is about experimenting with new narratives not about retreading old tropes about amurican marines surviving holocaust and crying with

their slaves about slavery that doesn't bring anything new to the table hardocre does 100\10 would have its children

didn't like original music clip though
also movie would be improved with better nudity
also theatrical run is censored
also copley is god

more choreographed fights with rapid weapon switching like in wanted would be nice

@темы: Кино, 0, Хардкор


Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

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продолжение man of steel с депрессивным убивающим ватманом и дико клёвым неканоничным лютером
простенько но развлекательно

@темы: 0, DC, DC Comics, batman, superman, wonder woman, Кино


Jane Got a Gun

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
простенький венстерн без какого либо обещанного на обложке феминизма

@темы: Jane Got a Gun, 0, Кино


Christopher Priest — The Inverted World

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
очередная вуду магия от приста

@темы: Книги, Christopher Priest, 0



Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
starts like a really cool 2015+ action movie with first person shots and hi tech equipment only to get bukakked all over by cohen in the middle with increasing volume until it starts to be rather funny (but totally crass) in the final third m.strong is good

@темы: Grimsby, 0, Кино


Левиафан (2014)

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
отвратительно претенциозный трешняк удивительным образом сочетающий в себе показушный закос под взрослскость, примитивную обыденность, недоработанную одномерность искусственных персонажей вместо людей с экспортными расовыми стереотипами, без какого-либо смысла или идеи и безмерно любительским синематографом не могущим определится с построением сцены или символизмом. всё на уровне домохозяйки с мыльницей впервые оказавшейся в горах и щёлкающей любую "природу" наугад. при том звягинцев не смог определится какая же концовка ему нравится больше (далее 1 ни одна не подходит и не все ставят точку и\или предоставляет катарсис) и потому он впихнул их все девять в ряд собирая финальный аккорд из любительской мазни с "природой"и пропагандой(?) религиозной бредятины и\или оправданием церковного стяжательства

ох так оно ещё оказывается интерпретацией истории c Job

в общем тех кто советовал сливать время на эту отупленную версию ежедневной действительности с одномерными персами за кураторов не считать а учитывая номинации на англосферные премии экспорт чернухи про карикатурное бухло и коррупцию с фальшивой руснёй продался неплохо

пс абсолютно рекламная статья в википедии какбы намекаэ

@темы: Кино, 0, Левиафан (2014)


西游记之大圣归来 (Xi you ji zhi da sheng gui lai)

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is really stylish with proper framerate textures and models but crass jokes keep it from being advisable
it has so much 3D that it almost works if it were in HFR and all retarded 2D cinematic effects like blur lens flare non volumetric fog smoke
flame and dust were removed it would be even worth to watch in 3D oh and water is also bad basically everything could be fixed with physx
а вот перевод дикое убожество традиционно слит AFX и сцена, убогие актёры так ещё и ощущение что лили с английской версии
самый треш когда записаны реплики на моменты где персонажи молчат

@темы: Journey to the West, 0, Xi you ji zhi da sheng gui lai, Кино



Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.

@темы: 0, Deadpool, marvel, x-men, Кино

Житие в княжестве Московском