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01:19 

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
Is the worst one so far. It has absolutely no plot, while writing is awful and makes no sense. All characters act out of the sсript, function like RNGs, and can't converse like humie beings. It's like aliens stole some human skin and try to blend in, not knowing that everyone in the crowd is also an alien who stole humie skin and tries to blend in.

It's a confusing pointless bore to watch.

@темы: Harry Potter, Индустрия Развлечений, Кино, Энтропия

01:08 

The Magnificent Seven (2016)

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
New The Magnificent Seven will please every Trump's voter with unprecedented amounts of racism — they whitewashed every mexican out of the movie.

But seriously, first movie has a better moral.
It was focused on the simple life of farmers, which will remain, while cowboys come and go and are no different from the outlaws. It had a full ark for the "kid", and showed him that there is nothing wrong with being a farmer with a wife instead of an adventurer without one.
New one is exactly what first movie was ((("deconstructing"))) — it's a "cowboys rode into sunset" movie, and no one wants to be a dumb farmer.

But movies are not tales, movies are visual medium, and using "gotta catch 'em all" captain planet PC racist stereotypes cast gave every of the main heroes personality (even if token one) and distinguished them from each other. Despite being smarter overall, original had a "kid", a "bald", and 5 "dads", one of whom had PTSD, but you can't tell which one, since all of the "dads" did look the same and didn't had enough screen time per "dad" to truly remember their quirks and characters. Though remake chickened out of calling "jane who got a gun" the real member of the seven after Hawke's character chickened out. At least that would be a statement; but of course he came back, because the genre and because it was in the original. On top of multiple distinct characters, remake has modern action cinematography, which much improved "dumb excitement" techniques, compared to the 60s, and all of the dumb scenes at least are fun, while being mostly tolerable in quality.

So, despite being dumber and inferior tale, in the end it is a slightly better movie.

@темы: Кино, Индустрия Развлечений, The Magnificent Seven, Seven Samurai, Кинотеатр

00:06 

Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
It is a tolerable xmen+harru potter movie with Burton's daddy issues and awful dumb writing.

@темы: Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children, Кино, Кинотеатр

23:48 

Коллектор

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
It is a nice movie in the one-man paranoid triller genre. character is interesting and Хабенский is a really good actor. Also it is answering the demand on the hot topic.

@темы: Коллектор, Кинотеатр, Кино

20:21 

Krampus (2015)

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
in the opening of krampus people watch 4:3 movie stretched to 16:9

is kinda good but it's totally a kids movie and krampus himself has insufficient animatronics compared to the rest of monsters
+bizzarro framreate during shouting

@темы: 0, Krampus, Кино

19:48 

Sir Terence David John Pratchett — Equal Rites

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
even on same level of dumbness delivery feels significantly improved
writing is slightly improved
i liked granny weatherwax in wyrdsisters and carpejugulum but in equal rites she is mostly stereotypically boring and underdeveloped(?(yet?)
Soooo The ending of the equal rites is underwhelming and went nowhere Also later parts of the book are heavy with undiegetic pop references
It kinda contradicts first two in how magic works.

@темы: 0, Discworld, Sir Terence David John Pratchett, Индустрия Развлечений, Книги

11:56 

interstellaria

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
interstellaria is interesting but gui is totally unusable, starting with ships being 2d instead of top down

saved two doods from death they were surplus didn't do anything all the time ate partied and slept
stumbled into sex-swap anomaly those two chicks just left with all my gear due to being "overworked"

it's nice but junky

@темы: Компьютерные Игры, 0

07:21 

Final Doom

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
The Plutonia Experiment

Yep. This is just exactly just more of Doom 2.

Yep. this is the same amateur\sequel\add-on style of level design of that era, with trolling, random riddles and giant unending levels. With the main idea being shoot more stuff coz shoot more stuff. Compared to base Doom 2 it is not even artistically coherent\correct and very gamey. Visually levels are pretty plain, uneventful and not memorable. And of course final boss would be an icon of sin which was bad even in the original. If you want just to play more levels for doom without regards to quality — it is for you.

TNT: Evilution

It starts very strong, with some new visuals and new music, but then it slows down at 2\5 mark to be as generic, trolly and poor as plutonia, after which it suddenly has a row of extremely short and plain levels. And overall Evilution is not thematically coherent, having you run around prisons, offices, warehouses, sewers and other boring real-life stuff. Though, sometimes you can find something truly amazing and great between them. Something which is very doom with all it's cultural zeitgeist and non-explicit references. Some parts are even surpassing both original Doom 2 and the Doom itself, some levels are legitimately artistically and technically great. And the final level is somewhat improved, with dumb puzzles, cyberdemon fight, and icon of sin (yes, again) being more combat heavy and sensible. I was on the verge of recommending it, but this release crashes in one place, and it doesn't display evilution text screens, instead it just uses plutonia ones, so you will never see the story of this add-on.

They tried so hard, and got so far, but in the end, it doesn't even matter. Some great stuff is spoiled with bad parts, after which it's ruined by the release, and on top of that there is the plutonia's dead weight.

@темы: Энтропия, Компьютерные Игры, Индустрия Развлечений, Doom

02:53 

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
is yet another dumb movie about dumb people which looks so pathetic it is targeted towards females
this time it says that alpha males get the grills and should always bully weak nerds
and that magic garbage society workslike putin's russia — it consists of cock-a-doodle-doos who are too adroop to vote or act
oh and harru is RIPPED just like an alpha male should be
now he need to bully sum dum nerds just like his redneck father did

and no one cared to use several available truth magics on the suspect who is also a witness on the differentе much more serious case

even vfx is downgraded from 3

@темы: Энтропия, Кино, Индустрия Развлечений, Harry Potter, 0

02:40 

Дуэлянт

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
it is a nice simple crime movie in a rare setting.it doesn't have any juxtaposition or a lot light-hearted action and there is no3
Дореволюціонный Совѣтчикъ on the ost to push it beyond, but still costumes are nice and acting is pleasant
they did a lot of historical research (i hope, haven't fact-checked it) on the duels, so it doesn't repeat same generic stuff all the time

imax is nothing to write home about
curved screen (more like kurwed) is a bad idea as always
the angular size is not that different
and if movie was not targeted toward it from the start there is no advantages in sound or picture's height
and even if it was it's not entirely bigger but only some scenes
also i could still see pixels and artefacts so there are no advantages in physical medium size for digital cameras (duh)

кинотеатр на кожуховской говно для пидорасов у этих долбоёбов синяя подсветка ступенек настолько ебучая что засвечивает 2\6 экрана целиком
впрочем и угловые размеры к нему относятся. только первый ряд более менее кроет, но он на одной высоте с экраном потмоу нихера не видно
а с 3 не большая разница с обычным кинотеатром на первом ряду

@темы: Кинотеатр, Кино, Дуэлянт, 0

22:41 

Grim Dawn

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
New H&SARPG game from the creators of Titan Quest, with the grimdark cthulhu + scrap-survival aesthetics. Game-play is similar to the Titan Quest, even loaning several mechanics from it, but a lot of outdated busywork was streamlined. The best part are reputation boosters, which you can give to your other heroes, so you won't need to grind as much.

Lowest difficulty is mostly a pleasant ride to the end, with couple of good items and mismatched skills, and without noticeable difficulty spikes in the main campaign. But on the elite+ the usual balance issues show themselves. On top of increasing enemies' stats, player character just receives extreme resistance penalty and cheap one-shots become a usual thing for any build, made not by the uniform min-max instructions. Ranged\mage characters becoming very unpleasant to play, since they are stationary when attacking and can't kite well. Unlike Titan Quest advanced difficulties don't even bring much new content. And the most unpleasant part of the new balance, is the fact, that higher levels bring less and less points to spend, while requiring more and more grind, which sucks all the joy out of levelling-up. On top of that, level capped character can't fill even one skill tree, so dual builds are much less interesting, which also reduces player's ability to experiment.

Graphically the game is pleasant, art-style is cohesive and models are peculiar. But enemies are done so good, that you can only wonder, why are you, yet again, forced to play as plain boring humans, when you would rather play as cursed scarecrow or some beastkin. Game works just fine on UHD UWS Surround out of the box, but is very demanding.

Overall it's not as great as Titan Quest, but inherits a lot of it's flaws. It's a great time for a couple of casual playthroughs, but manages to become even more frustrating than Titan Quest on advanced difficulties. Diminishing returns of levelling-up hit hard player's incentive to spend more time in the game.

@темы: Компьютерные Игры

21:48 

Stardew Valley

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
It's slightly awkward to control, but it is a good casual skinner treadmill when you need one. Combat is obviously bad, but it can be ignored completely if you are ok with keeping your snail's pace.

Narrative is really awkward and gamey — you can get robbed in the town of 10 people, people intrude into your home, you can't sleep on your property (i sometimes took naps on the ground in my 600 m^2 irl), amount of lines of dialogue is expectantly limited etc. The message about spooky scary evool supermarkets is pathetic and misleading — game always tells you that their prices are cheaper, then forces you to use local shop because it's other way around. Also siding with jojo cuts a chunk of a gameplay and content from the game. And the end result of siding with 4-eyes redneck (whose dream is to beat down "flamboyant" puffy dude with pink bow-tie, to drive him and the cashier away from the town forever, because they don't take kindly to that kind around here) won't be worth it anyway. [Kumbaya my Lord, Kumbaya] All while Shane will lose his job and drink himself to death by selling cows he stole from his aunt. He will never discover his passion for cinematography.
The amount of bachelors is very limited and doesn't feature a single male, also i can't see a single reason why me and my dyke 2d trailer-redneck waifu can't both shag a hobo to get preggies. Why are we have to adopt refugees baby when we are two healthy alpha females and can have our own bellydwellers? We are strong independent capable women!

Music is pathetic and can be ignored, don't forget to put your lolicore playlist on, so your crop would sprang meaty, strong, hugh mungus and already covered in the dew. Your 2d waifu will have no other choice, but to award it with a gold star sticker. Game looks fine and pleasant from the first glance, but if you ever drawn pixelart — the amount of frivolity with decipixeling, transparencies, fonts and other "cheating" is somewhat jarring. Technically game works just great, it adapts to UHD UWS surround, runs smooth and is stable.

Treat your redneck 2d waifu nicely (even alex) and avoid game's community and the modding scene whatever it takes, both sides of it. *shudders*

@темы: Компьютерные Игры

16:55 

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
yet more of the same garbage this time with sexual harassment and middle school of death

the universe is totally inconsistent and absolutely random with its rules. plot just happens & stuff from previous instalments is forgotten

final fight is laughable pathetic and retarded and this whole series can only be enjoyed by >f e m a l e s<
i.e. it is a shit for faggots

if we have hp parents and patison ghosts why they don't live in the hogwarts? why parents don't speak with and guide hp then?

wtf is with hermione? is she having her period? she runs around screaming hysterically and being annoying. why ron acting like a faggot?

and wtf happened to hogwarts? in fourth instalment is just like been turned into burned kebab refugee shelter

@темы: Кино, Индустрия Развлечений, Harry Potter, 0

16:47 

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
is a convoluted pile of shit
it has so much plot devices that it doesn't make any sense and chars are just blind

they finally did add transitions, but plot is still overcompressed while being overly long all-while being empty and uneventful

@темы: Энтропия, Кино, Индустрия Развлечений, Harry Potter, 0

16:46 

Ben-Hur (2016)

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
is nice
costumes are great and iconography is kewl

@темы: 0, ben-hur, Кино, Кинотеатр

08:09 

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
is yet another garbage HP movie
ironically in the second movie kids forgot how to act at all harru and ron act worse than the toilet stalls which are the real leads and have the longest runtime in the film
to tolerate retarded retreading of the opening just pretend that it's uncle monty on screen 10 years after being cured in the christian camp
this is me, hurru in the corner

it has the same incoherent structure with jumps from summer to winter in the matter of 10 minutes without any chapter envelopes
which is baffling considering it's 2:40 runtime and that it manages to tell less than LOTR all while lacking any downtime and char develpmnt
it literally has machina ex machina and several other plot devices and scripted resolutions
some plot "punchlines" lack any proper setups and just happen

and the morbidity of this movie is just baffling

@темы: Энтропия, Кинотеатр, Кино, Индустрия Развлечений, Harry Potter

08:06 

Nine Lives

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
is a generic movie in the "2000s talking cgi animals" subgenre as a revival it is a peculiar case but does it have any die-hard fans who prefer it to 90s livaction talking animals subgenre?
with bad acting from mother and daughter's actors

oh and sound design is retarded they use fake cat barks every second of cat's on-screen time, even while real cat has it's mouth shut

@темы: Кинотеатр, Кино, Индустрия Развлечений, Nine Lives, 0

08:00 

Sausage Party

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
is a pointless pathetic retarded degenerate seth rogen's pile of shit with 1,5 "jokes" and drugs because that is a generic seth rogen for you ahahha aren't drugs like phunnie guise?
but it has great 8\10 freebie coloring+puzzle book with the tickets
translation is obviously rated E for everyone and buns don't use vertical kinetics, which is a waste and a copout

@темы: Мультипликация/анимация, Кинотеатр, Индустрия Развлечений, Энтропия, Sausage Party, 0

14:15 

Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
is as shitty movie as i remember it, but this time i noticed how random and incoherent it is. i'm all for skipping of the boring scenes and tropes, but with such months-long jumps you should have different narrative envelope
like some chapters or time stamps, yes you can tell from visuals what happening, but it's just uncanny and uncomfortable, it gives uncanny feels of incompleteness with such blink-of-the-eye transitions. allwhile story thread treating it as a constant current

also skipping boring mundane scenes is not the same as skipping stuff in retarded magic shitshow world. they do world-building and are only mundane from diegetic POV but not from consumer's POV.

characters are awful and chosen oneness is to the max world is random garbage extremely violent sport with kids don't use protection gear

@темы: 0, Harry Potter, Индустрия Развлечений, Кино, Энтропия

13:52 

Jason Bourne

Сынок знаешь, ты тоже вот-вот кудесником станешь.
can't decide if it is equally or more retarded than first three but "jesus bore 5" is retarded nonetheless

it was filmed by retard who spent last 10 years on meth so it has 30 different shots per minute and you can't see shit what happening. cinematography is shit with unlimited shaky camera works. scenery is magic shit filled with teleporters

it's as boring and sleep-inducing as every jesus bore movie

@темы: 0, Bourne, Индустрия Развлечений, Кино, Кинотеатр, Энтропия

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